Joke on Indian News Channels

Here is how the Indian TV news channel NDTV 24x7 [All news Channel] would
report the Jack and Jill nursery rhyme. All names (except those of Jack and
Jill), are fictitious....credit to the original author who have given this...thanx for him...

Prashant - TV Anchor

Two persons have been injured in a freak climbing accident. Jack and his
companion Jill had gone up a hill to fetch a pail of water when Jack fell
down and broke his crown. Jill came tumbling after. Live from the hill, our
reporter, Amrita Shah, takes up the story.

Amrita Shah

Thank you Prashant. Well, as you say, two persons - Jack and Jill - had gone
up a hill to fetch a pail of water. Suddenly, Jack fell down and broke his
crown and Jill came tumbling after. Prashant.

Prashant

Thank you Amrita. What do we know about the hill?

Amrita

Not too much. Jack was going up the hill to fetch a pail of water when he
fell down and broke his crown. Jill came tumbling after

[Headline appears at the foot of the TV screen: "hill breaks crown of
pail-boy Jack"]

Prashant

What news of Jack and Jill?

Amrita

Prashant, it seems that Jack had gone up the hill to fetch a pail of water.
We know nothing about the pail, or how heavy it was but it seems that Jack
fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after. I have here with
me, an eyewitness to the accident, Mr Shahid Trivedi. Mr Shahid, tell us
what you saw.

Shahid Trivedi

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and
broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.

[Headline appears at the foot of the TV screen: "Boy and girl tumble down
hill. Water spilled"]

Amrita

Jack and Jill. What do we know about them? Are they brother and sister? Are
they married? Just what were they doing on the hill together?

Shahid Trivedi

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail a water.

Amrita

And what happened next?

Shahid Trivedi

Jack fell down and broke his crown

Amrita

Go on.

Shahid Trivedi

And Jill came tumbling after.

Amrita

Prashant, there you have it. Two people innocently going about their
business to fetch a pail of water when one of them falls down, breaks his
crown, and the other comes tumbling after. Back to you in the studio
Prashant.

[Headline appears at the foot of the TV screen: "Water errand ends in
tragedy"]

Prashant

I have with me in the studio now, Professor Chandrashekar Belagare from the
Indian Institute of Applied Hill Sciences. Professor: a hill; Jack; Jill; a
pail of water. A tragedy waiting to happen?

Professor

Well that depends on the hill, the two persons, the object they were
carrying and the conditions underfoot. Let us look at the evidence so far.

Jack and Jill

Went up the hill

To fetch a pail of water.

Jack fell down

And broke his crown

And Jill came tumbling after.

Clearly, one would suspect that if Jack's fall was severe enough to break
his crown then the surface of the hill must have been slippery or unstable.
But I think we're overlooking something quite fundamental here. Who was
carrying the pail? Jack fell down and broke his crown and - this is the key
- Jill came tumbling after. If Jack and Jill had been carrying the pail
together, would they not have fallen at the same time? The fact that Jill
came tumbling after suggests that Jack lost his footing first and perhaps
knocked Jill over as he slipped.

Prashant

Professor thank you very much. So there we have it, two persons - Jack and
Jill - went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke
his crown and Jill came tumbling after. Later in the programme, Osama bin
Laden captured in Afghanistan, President Bush says rent-boy menage-a-trois
was "just a brief lapse of judgement", and Pakistan launches nuclear
warheads against key Indian cities. But next up, join us after the break for
a studio discussion about hills, boys and girls and whether water-fetching
trips should be supervised. We'll be right back...

A MUST read about CANCER

Hi all.....I post here below A MUST read about CANCER & please do circulate it as much as possible
-AFTER YEARS OF TELLING PEOPLE CHEMOTHERAPY IS THE ONLY WAY TO TRY AND ELIMINATE CANCER, JOHNS HOPKINS IS FINALLY STARTING TO TELL YOU THERE IS AN ALTERNATIVE WAY .

Cancer Update from Johns Hopkins :

1. Every person has cancer cells in the body. These cancer cells do not show up in the standard tests until they have multiplied to a few billion. When doctors tell cancer patients that there are no more cancer cells in their bodies after treatment, it just means the tests are unable to detect the cancer cells because they have not reached the detectable size.

2. Cancer cells occur between 6 to more than 10 times in a person's lifetime.

3. When the person's immune system is strong the cancer cells will be destroyed and prevented from multiplying and forming tumours.

4. When a person has cancer it indicates the person has multiple nutritional deficiencies. These could be due to genetic, environmental, food and lifestyle factors.

5.. To overcome the multiple nutritional deficiencies, changing diet and including supplements will strengthen the immune system.

6.. Chemotherapy involves poisoning the rapidly-growing cancer cells and also destroys rapidly-growing healthy cells in the bone marrow,
gastro-intestinal tract etc, and can cause organ damage, like liver, kidneys, heart, lungs etc.

7. Radiation while destroying cancer cells also burns, scars and damages healthy cells, tissues and organs.

8. Initial treatment with chemotherapy and radiation will often reduce tumor size. However prolonged use of chemotherapy and radiation do not result in more tumor destruction.

9. When the body has too much toxic burden from chemotherapy and radiation the immune system is either compromised or destroyed, hence the person can succumb to various kinds of infections and complications.

10. Chemotherapy and radiation can cause cancer cells to mutate and become resistant and difficult to destroy. Surgery can also cause cancer cells to spread to other sites.

11. An effective way to battle cancer is to starve the cancer cells by not feeding it with the foods it needs to multiply.


WHAT CANCER CELLS FEED ON:

a. Sugar is a cancer-feeder. By cutting off sugar it cuts off one important food supply to the cancer cells. Sugar substitutes like NutraSweet, Equal,Spoonful etc are made with Aspartame and it is harmful. A better natural substitute would be Manuka honey or molasses but only in very small amounts. Table salt has a chemical added to make it white in colour. Better alternative is Bragg's aminos or sea salt.

b. Milk causes the body to produce mucus, especially in the gastro-intestinal tract.. Cancer feeds on mucus. By cutting off milk and
substituting with unsweetened soya milk, cancer cells are being starved..

c. Cancer cells thrive in an acid environment.. A meat-based diet is acidic and it is best to eat fish, and a little chicken rather than beef or pork. Meat also contains livestock antibiotics, growth hormones and parasites, which are all harmful, especially to people with cancer.

d. A diet made of 80% fresh vegetables and juice, whole grains, seeds, nuts and a little fruits help put the body into an alkaline
environment. About 20% can be from cooked food including beans.. Fresh vegetable juices provide live enzymes that are easily absorbed and reach down to cellular levels within 15 minutes to no urish and enhance growth of healthy cells. To obtain live enzymes for building healthy cells try and drink fresh vegetable juice (most vegetables including bean sprouts) and eat some raw vegetables 2 or 3 times a day.. Enzymes are destroyed at temperatures of 104 degrees F (40 degrees C).

e. Avoid coffee, tea, and chocolate, which have high caffeine. Green tea is a better alternative and has cancer-fighting properties. Water- best to drink purified water, or filtered, to avoid known toxins and heavy metals in tap water. Distilled water is acidic, avoid it.


12. Meat protein is difficult to digest and requires a lot of digestive enzymes. Undigested meat remaining in the intestines become putrified and leads to more toxic buildup.

13. Cancer cell walls have a tough protein covering. By refraining from or eating less meat it frees more enzymes to attack the protein walls of cancer cells and allows the body's killer cells to destroy the cancer cells.

14. Some supplements build up the immune system (IP6, Flor-ssence, Essiac, anti-oxidants, vitamins, minerals, EFAs etc.) to enable the
body's own killer cells to destroy cancer cells. Other supplements like vitamin E are known to cause apoptosis, or programmed cell death, the body's normal method of disposing of damaged, unwanted, or unneeded cells.

15. Cancer is a disease of the mind, body, and spirit. A proactive and positive spirit will help the cancer warrior be a survivor. Anger,
unforgiveness and bitterness put the body into a stressful and acidic environment. Learn to have a loving and forgiving spirit. Learn to relax and enjoy life.

16. Cancer cells cannot thrive in an oxygenated environment. Exercising daily, and deep breathing help to get more oxygen down to the cellular level. Oxygen therapy is another means employed to destroy cancer cells.

(PLEASE FORWARD IT TO PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT) ...Nagamahesh

Nice Moral Story

Hi all, read the story below...nice one....

One old man was sitting with his 25 years old son in the train.

Train is about to leave the station.

All passengers are settling down in their seats.

As train started, young man was filled with lot of joy and curiosity.

He was sitting on the window side.

He went near the door, kept out his one hand and was feeling the passing air. He shouted, "Papa see all trees are going behind".

Old man smile and admired son feelings.

Beside the young man, one couple were sitting and listening to all the conversation between father and son.

They were little annoyed with the attitude of 25 years old man behaving like a small child.

Suddenly young man again shouted, "Papa see the pond and animals. Clouds are moving with train".

Couple were watching the young man embarrassingly.

Now it starts raining and some water drops touches the young man's hand. He is filled with joy and he closed the eyes. He shouted again,

" Papa it's raining, water is touching me, see papa".

Couple couldn't help themselves and tolerate any more and asked the old man.

"Why don't you visit the Doctor and get treatment for your son."

Old man said,

" Yes, We are coming from the hospital only, as Today only my son got his eye sight for first time in his life".


Moral: "Don’t draw conclusions until you know all the facts".

Hi all friends

Hi all..its been a very long time since posted on the blog...I was down with Chicken Guniea fever and was quite busy with PA Recruitment Test duty and still I am ...but I wanted to post atleast today...so I am now here...how are all of you? Whatz going on at your end? I will post regularly from now on....bye for now...

Inspirational Story

Hey...its almost a week since I posted my blog...SORRY for that..now I got some interesting story from Internet for you...just read it and enjoy your week end. Thanks for the Original Author who ever it is...
Click here to read the Story
Happy Diwali to all our friends...may God bless all our friends and their families with smiles like flowerpots and health like 1000 wala...

Blood Donors - Important Info

Hi all,
Everybody knows the important of Blood donation and it some times can be fatal when required is not available. Only the needy people know the value of Blood Donation at their requirement. Its a hectic & difficult process to get required blood at the needy times. But now its bit easy.
All you have to do is, just give SMS
"BLOOD " and send SMS to 96000 97000
and then donor will contact you immediately and speak details.
Please inform all your friends & relatives about this...it can save many a lifes....

What do Dreams Mean?

Hey all,
Everybody will dream one or something at nights and at many times most people enjoy their dreams. Isn't it? For my self, I enjoy a lot about my dreams and I always wonder what they mean. Recently I tried to search Dream Analysis in Google.Com and I got a lot of results to my search. You also can try it and most amazingly it is very interesting topic. One of the website I have seen is Dreammoods. Click on it to check your self.